Change of heart or tactic?

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Okay, secretive, creepy, chicken hearted bully, what are you up to now?

For six years you’ve done everything you could to make life miserable. And I’ll admit it, your campaign has been very successful. I’ve felt uncomfortable in my own yard, unable to escape the invisible ray that radiates a miasma of hate from your house.

Then yesterday you cut back the bushes that had turned the shared driveway into a shared walkway.

What!

After five years of letting them, and an interesting variety of weeds, grow wild, you cut them? Unbelievable! The driveway actually looks like a driveway now!

But I’m confused. You do realize that cutting the bushes is a nice thing to do, don’t you? That it actually makes things more pleasant instead of less?

I’m just mentioning it because, well, it does go against the normal policy of your campaign.

So what happened?
Have you have had a change of heart?
Are you turning away from a life of bullying toward a life of good will?
Have you decided that life is too short to waste in the dark dungeon of bullydom?

Or, gulp, is this a ploy to put me off my guard so that wham, some new dastardly deed you’ve concocted will be that much more of a surprise, and therefore give an even more satisfying jolt.

Darn it! Even when you do something nice it puts me on edge.

You sir, are an evil genius.

What do you think?

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