Conversing with fifth graders

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They are not all like this, but here are a few of the conversations I’ve had during various question and answer periods at elementary school author visits. These all occurred with fifth graders:

Student: “Have your books made a million dollars yet?”
Me: “No.”
Student: “How much have you made?”
Me: “I think I’ll keep that to myself.”
Student: “Why?”
Me: “It’s private.”
Student: “No it’s not. You’re an author, you have to tell.”
*****
Student: “Can I have a free book?”
Me: “No.”
Student: “Why not?”
Me: “Because there are no free books.”
Student: “Don’t you get free books?”
Me: “No. I have to pay for them too.”
Student: “That’s stupid! You should get them free!”
*****
Student: “Can I be an author?”
Me: “Do you like to read?”
Student: “No, I hate reading?”
Me: “If you hate reading, why do you want to write?”
Student: “I don’t want to write, I want to be famous and make lots of money the easy way!”

Most of the time fifth graders are great, but sometimes they make me sigh.

What do you think?